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“
I regret nothing.
”
–Postal Dude
Postal Dude (포ᄉ탈 두데, Portal Dude) is the friend of Gebura, and formerly lives in a trailer car with The Bitch. He is met after unlocking theFloor of Language, after completing the Reception of Krotchy.
Postal Dude has short red slicked back hair, with antenna-like strands sticking over his head, an auburn goatee coating his chin. He wears a black leather coat over a blue T-shirt designed with an alien decal as well as blue jeans and black boots. On his jacket collar is a yellow smiley-face pin and he wears dark sunglasses on his face.
Personality
Postal Dude’s personality is unserious and sarcastic, making unnecessary yet humorous comments for no reason. He’s direct in a way that could be taken as rude or callous, a main reason why he gets along so well with the red-haired librarian. Has a tendency to become unexpectedly violent in which he will show little to no remorse for his brutal actions.
Combat Info
Postal Dude's Page
This is the Key Page given to Postal Dude by default. It is one of only three default Librarian pages with Passive Abilities, the other being the Patron Librarian of Philosophy’s Page ×0.5 ×1 ×1 ×0.25 ×1 ×1 Speed Ⅲ Speed Dice Slot +1. Gain an additional Speed die at Emotion Level 3. (Cannot Overlap) Binah Has a unique Key page and Combat Pages that cannot be replaced or swapped. Incomplete Arbiter At the start of the Scene, draw until 4 pages are in hand..
Postal Dude's Key Page possess 3 Passive Abilities, of which 2 are unique:
Mail Truck: Speed Dice Slot +1. Gain an additional Speed die at Emotion Level 3. (Cannot Overlap)
Going Postal: Speed Dice Slot+1. Only Postal Dude can equip this. Unique Mass Attack becomes accessible.
Health Pipe: Recover %15 HP when hit to 1 HP. Recovers 2 Light.
Dialogue
Combat Entrance
Can't we all just get along?
If there were stricter gun laws, this sorta thing wouldn't happen.
I've really gotta take a leak.
Well these errands aren't gonna do themselves.
Hi there, would you like to sign my petition?
Today's the first day of the end of your lives!
You probably think I'm not a nice person.
Ahhh, time to partay with Mr. Napalm!
I need to take a piss.
On Kill
And another one bites the dust!
Oh! Medicare ain't covering that!
Only my weapon understands me.
That was bad of me, wasn't it?
Buttsauce.
Teammate Death
Shit, now I'm gonna have to cure myself.
Oh great, now my day is complete.
This is so humiliating.
Why does this not surprise me?
You gotta be fucking kidding.
Death
Ahh! Withdrawal is a bitch.
Ooof, my nads.
I regret nothing.
Ooh, mommy.
I feel like shit.
Victory
Guns don't kill people, I do.
I regret nothing.
Mission accomplished, with extreme prejudice!
Time to head home.
Trivia
Postal Dude originates from the Postal franchise by Running with Scissors.
Postal Dude has a pitbull named Champ, who is does not appear in Library of Ruina.
This page was made by two cats in a trench coat who love Gebura and Postal Dude.
Passive Abilities, of which 2 are unique:
Mail Truck: Speed Dice Slot +1. Gain an additional Speed die at Emotion Level 3. (Cannot Overlap)
Speed Dice Slot +1. Only Postal Dude can equip this. Unique Mass Attack becomes accessible.
